8 tips to improve communication with teens

There are many parents of teenagers who feel that there is a growing gap in communication with their children, that no matter how much they try to get closer, they almost always come across short answers that do not give to follow a normal conversation and with the irremediable screen of the cell phone or video games preventing them from really connecting with them.

If you want to improve the relationship with your teenage children, pay attention to all these tips to improve communication with teens. They will be very useful!

It is true (and normal) that as children grow, their friends become a central part of their lives and that conversations or activities that they previously enjoyed with their parents are no longer attractive to them; However, that is not why we must give up having an open communication channel and letting them know that we will always be there when they need us.

Here are some tips to get there:

  1. Listen to it. If your teenager shares information with you about anything, always listen carefully to him (stop what you're doing) and feel very, very lucky. At this age they share much more things with their friends than with their parents and it is nothing personal, it is a process that occurs naturally, that is why it is so important that when they communicate with us, they find us receptive and willing.
  2. Manage tips. Not always that our children tell us something, it is because they are waiting for our expert and wise opinion, sometimes they just want to share us. That sometimes is hard for us to understand, because we are always ready to help them solve problems, so we can go out giving them opinions, recommendations and even prohibitions after some casual conversation causing them to think twice the next time.
  3. Watch your reactions. In those cases in which the information causes you a "panic attack", he pretends to be calm .... suppose he tells you that one of his colleagues got drunk at a party ... do not make any judgments (at least out loud), especially if it is a friend of yours; instead ask key questions to understand the situation; then it is important that you ask him his opinion on the matter and listen carefully; It will be easier then, to reinforce the points that seem significant to you or to give your point of view…. always trying not to fall into extremes. Sometimes it works very well to tell him an anecdote of yours from when you were his age to make clear a lesson or topic that you would like him to reflect on.
  4. Do not speak ill of their friends. You can have your own judgments about their friends, however, take great care how you express yourself to them. If you throw negative judgments lightly, you can make your child close off and prefer to stay away from his social life, causing a gap in communication with him. If there is a friend whose behaviors seem inappropriate, refer to those behaviors, but not to their person and try to understand what your child finds in that friendship.
  5. Tell him about yourself. Sometimes we have a crazy yearning for our children to tell us all the details of their lives, but we rarely share topics of ours. Try telling him a little about yourself, your day, your joys, your worries, your memories and wait for his reaction, it will probably be a good way to shorten distances.
  6. Connect with what you like. This technique almost never fails. All teenagers have their weaknesses: favorite music, singers, movies, youtubers, sports, video games, etc. Be interested in the topics that your child is passionate about, who better than him to answer your questions, you will see how immediately he becomes excited and a new door opens towards communication with him.
  7. Invite him to his favorite place. It's hard to resist an invitation to your favorite place to eat, have ice cream, or watch a movie; Surprise him from time to time and take advantage of that moment to talk and get closer to him.
  8. Thank you. When possible, tell him that you appreciate him sharing his things with you, that you love talking with him and that he can always count on you…. Will be back to you very soon!

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